easton.

I'll never forget the day that Destiny told Austin and me that we should watch this video that she made for Avery in celebration of him finishing his Masters. Watching this video now, I feel so silly for not knowing what was actually going on. We watched the video side by side on their loveseat while they watched over our shoulders waiting for our reaction. If you know me at all, you know that my reaction was full of tears and hugs. I was so excited for us to be aunt and uncle to this new bundle of joy. If you have an extra few minutes you should watch it... I still cry every single time.

Today I spent the day with two year old Easton. I picked him up, and he immediately said, "kitties." I let him know that we would see the kitties later, but for now we were going to go get ice cream on the MAX (our light rail). He loves the MAX. We sat and waited for the red line and got to watch cars on the highway pass. He kept saying "whoa, fast," and "Linny, look." Once we got on the MAX, he sat next to me and held my hand. We watched people get on and off, talked about the bridges, and looked at the mountains. At every stop he looked up at me and asked, "more?." Once we got to the frozen yogurt shop, he stuck by my side as we sampled the different flavors and made our choices. After eating our froyo, we walked over to Target to buy new sunglasses and toys for Linny's home. I was amazed by Easton's ability to pick out what he wanted when given choices and his obedience when I asked him come on and put the toys back. We checked out and got back on the MAX to go see the kitties. While walking back to my apartment from the MAX station, Easton looked at me, kissed me and said "I love you, Linny." Heart. Broken. In the best way possible.

Sometimes I get so caught up in my own self-pity and selfish desires. It is so refreshing to be around Easton's innocence and excitement over what I constantly take for granted. I had no idea how much joy someone could bring to my life. Easton was born exactly two months after Austin and I separated. Easton will always have a special place in my heart because of the timing that he entered my life. I felt so hopeless and he gave me hope. I felt so much resentment, and he softened my heart. I still struggle with feeling insufficient and lost, but Easton thinks I'm grounded. Easton loves his Linny. I know I can't get all my worth from that, but it does help remind me that I am more than my insecurities and self-pity.